Jan 30, 2010

Echoes Across The Blue Ridge

Keep your eyes peeled for this upcoming anthology due out this spring! I am one of the authors included in the volume with an essay titled "A Walk In The Dark".

Get more info at the NCNW West's blog
NetWest Mountain Writers and Poets
or from anthology editor Nancy Simpson's blog
Living Above The Frost Line

Giving Over

"Give your life to the one who already owns your breath and your moments.” - Rumi, from The One This You Must Do.

I sat down today to read from this book of poetry as I was cleaning my house. The depth of this passage touched me deeply. I recognize this is what I want the most and am the most afraid of. But I want it more that the fear can distract me. And I am moved to tears. Although I do not think I have spent my life in service of others, I am not married and have no children, I certainly have given my life to my fear and pain. Given the very life of me to that which bleeds me and leaves me lying in a ball on the floor too worn out to move. I have given almost all of me away to that very thing that murders me. Yet the pain of all that I have given up has kept me stuck, repeating the same patterns over and over.

I want to give my life over to the one, knowing that “one” is not outside of me but in me, is the very me I see in the mirror each morning. That “one” is the very breath and this very moment of me. I want to surrender my life to my spirit knowing that each step I take is simply a response. I no longer have to figure it all out , figure out how this or that is going to happen, how I am going to pay this months bills or wonder, as I step out my door at any moment, if what I am presenting is real.

If I give my life over, if I take my authority back, and really own all that is me what am I really giving up? Pain? Grief? Uncertainty? I can actually let go of the act, let go of the show, and be the truth of me that I was sent here to be. I can actualy get done what I came here to do. I can stop lying to myself and the world at large and maybe, just maybe, find something I lost long ago....Me.